Fun with Mean Girls quotes: A Tribute to Mitt Romney

Let me tell you something about Mitt Romney. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It’s so embarrassing. I don’t even… Whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started liking Barack Obama because he’s totally democratic and for the people, and Mitt was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow him off to hang out with Obama, he’d be like, “Why didn’t you call me back?” And I’d be like, “Why are you so obsessed with me?”
So then, for my birthday party, which was a non-prejudiced pool party, I was like, “Mitt, I can’t invite you, because you’re Republican.” I mean I couldn’t have a Republican at my party. There were gonna be all sorts of people and cultures there, being democratic. I mean, right? He was a REPUBLICAN. So then his mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then he lost the election because no one wanted that kind of Republican in the White House and he’s actually pretty racist and ridiculous, and when he came back after the election, he lost a whole bunch of Facebook friends and blamed his losing on black and Hispanic people, and he was totally weird, and now I guess he’s on crack. 


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